Battered

I cry
apparently about nothing

No one hit me
or beat me
or assaulted me
but I feel
all
that pain

fingering each pale
silvery stiff scar
and remember each bruise
like an old friend

I push into the purple heart
to see if it
still smarts
or if the ache is fading

I find I have injuries
in various stages of healing

My sister says
muscle has memory

So
what is it
the left side of my body
re-collects
as I lay
like a corpse
in an attempt
to let it all fall away